Wake me up when it's all over

Dear BYU Professors,

I have only recently begun understanding the harshest reality of attending a research-based university: you don't care about me. I mean, obviously you don't want me to get stabbed or anything, but you also see me as 150 minutes per week you don't get to spend doing your research. And, surprisingly, I'm okay with this. I don't need you to like me or care about my intellectual well-being. After all, I have a mother. And probably some future cats (I hate cats but at this point I feel it's inevitable).

I figure that if you did care more about students than research you would have applied to work at BYU-Idaho. But you didn't. You are here. I am here. And neither of our interests or goals quite align, other than you need BYU's money to learn stuff and I give BYU money to give me a piece of paper that will tell people I'm smart.

Now that we've gotten that out in the open, can we talk about the arbitrary hoops you place in front of me at every turn? "Mini assignments" and "quizzes" and "reading logs." Do you really care that I did it? Will proof that I read another outdated article about minority-group relations and responded with my feelings help your research get published? Because it sure isn't helping me learn anything about what I really want to know. In fact, I'd say it's impeding my actual education.


I understand that grades are the operationalization of my intellectual development. But guess what, it's not working. Universities have turned into the world's largest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos. Those little white balls I repeatedly grasp for do not satiate. I remain hungry for knowledge because you've had me chomping at facts for the last 4+ years.

Why have you allowed your departments to craft precisely what I must know in order to be a "good sociologist?" Isn't sociology action oriented? Within this premise, why do my methods courses make me do research that's already been done? To prove I can master the syntax? I would only care to master the syntax if I cared about the result but you don't let me pick my own data sets. Or variables. Or breakfast (Raisin Bran if you must know). If you knew how much I don't care about 90% of what you force me to do or read you probably wouldn't feel so bad about how much you don't care about the classes you're forced to teach.

Our relationship could be much more symbiotic if you'd realize that drills and chores and tasks do not a scholar make. 

Thanks,
Chaela Mcdonald
disgruntled supersenior


PS - I understand that with Raisin Bran as my favorite cereal I am headed for cat-lady status. I'm dealing with it.